Mr. Jackson and the others over at New Line, MGM, Wingnut, and the rest decided to open The Desolation of Smaug not only on one of the most unlucky days of the year (if you believe Friday the 13th is bad luck), but also right as all of my college instructors started piling on the pre-Finals study material/homework.
Granted, my Pastor and I went into the movie expecting to be disappointed. I also ran into a few classmates and fellow Ring Fanatics/Whovians on opening Friday afternoon, and they'd apparently gone to see it on Thursday night (midnight?). They absolutely loved it. They hated the 3D 48-fps version. I'd already decided that I'd go on opening weekend regardless of what Finals looked like, so at 10am on December 14th, there I was, standing in line at the movie theatre with my Dad, my stepmom, my brother, and two of my buddies. But, as always, we went to the 2D regular showing.
My dad and my stepmom hated it.
Both of my friends were (unbeknownst to me) terrified of giant, dwarf-eating spiders.
I think my brother and I were the only ones who really, thoroughly enjoyed the whole thing (including the spiders). It was after the incident with the spiders and after watching The Host with one of my friends that evening that I came to the conclusion that I am officially desensitized beyond the point of no return (with a few exceptions).
But, when later asked for my personal opinion of the movie, I had to think about it. The book-to-film accuracy freak side of me was disappointed and a bit irritated with some of the changes that were made. The die-hard movie goer side of me loved it. In the end, my conclusion is this; there are three types of book-to-film movie adaption categories;
1. The movie is spot on to the book, with a few minor differences to help the overall flow of the story, but usually nothing too big or noticeable. (The Lion, the Witch, and the Wardrobe is a good example of Category #1.)
2. The movie is different from the book, but is still a good movie if considered a "stand-alone" piece separated from the original story. (Prince Caspian is a good example of Category #2.)
3. The movie is so different from the original story that it is sickening, to the point that whatever those crazy film people did to it is purely unforgivable. (Voyage of the Dawn Treader is a PERFECT example of Category #3.)
The Hobbit: The Desolation of Smaug falls into Category #2. Of course, being in this category doesn't mean that book-to-film accuracy freaks like myself are all hunky-dory with all of the changes. My Pastor, my Hobbit-fanatic classmate, and I still had our share of complaints about it. But, my classmate and I can still somehow say, "It was AMAZING!"
Why?
I'm glad you asked.
1. Scenery
Peter Jackson and Company do not disappoint us movie-goers who sit through his two hour 40 minute monstrosities just to see the pretty scenery. We're even happily when we discover that most of those landscapes are REAL PLACES that we could potentially go to someday!
2. The Action
If you come out of The Desolation of Smaug and can look me in the eyes and tell me it was boring, I'll check to make sure we saw the same movie.
3. The Characters
All of our favorite characters are back again for the continuation of the adventure!
So, why didn't we like it?
Again, I'm glad you asked.
1. Orlando Bloom
If you're one of those people who went to see Desolation of Smaug solely because of Orlando Bloom, I pity you. As it is, Legolas doesn't even show so much as a toenail in the book. His being in the movie is purely for his fans (big star with big fandom equals more revenue for film). Sorry Orlando. You're a great actor, but you don't belong in The Hobbit.
However, this can be excused by the simple fact that Legolas is Thranduil's son. Also, it is important to note that Elves lives an exceptionally long time, even longer than the average Dwarf or Hobbit. Therefore, it is reasonable to assume that Legolas could have been present in Mirkwood at the time of The Hobbit, even though he is not directly mentioned in the book. His absence from the book is simply due to the fact that, as my Pastor has stated to me on multiple occasions, Tolkien hadn't yet conceived the character of Legolas when he wrote The Hobbit.
So, we have to excuse Peter Jackson and Company for working Legolas into the movies.
2. Kili and Tauriel
Save us! Another stupid, unnecessary romance! Tauriel was made up by the filmmakers for the purpose of giving the movies some feminine flare. All that being said, the "romance" between her and Kili is altogether uncalled for and unnecessary.
Besides that fact that I generally identify myself among the anti-Twilight crowd (I'm so sick of unnecessary romance), it's a flat out insult to the world and various cultures of Middle Earth.
Remember what we've already discussed about An Unexpected Journey? Here's a quick refresh: In summary, Dwarves HATE Elves, and Elves reciprocate. They just do. They've never really gotten along. But, Thorin and the folks from Erebor have a particular grudge against the elves of Mirkwood due to the fact that Thranduil refused to help them when Smaug attacked the Lonely Mountain.
So, would someone please explain to me why Kili is suddenly so attracted to Tauriel? Or why Tauriel is so attracted to Kili?
In the words of Melanie Stryder (infamous voice in Wanderer's head from The Host), "Why is he looking at you? In fact, why are you looking at him?"
Flat out disrespect for the story. That's the only explanation my Pastor and I could come up with.
I understand, some things need to change every so often. Prince Caspian is, admittedly, the slowest paced of the seven Narnia books, so the added Battle Scene was a welcome addition (even for me). But, this added romance is uncalled for and unnecessary. It just disrupted the flow and integrity of the story. That is unforgivable!
Of course, you might be saying, "But, their romance saved Kili's life."
Well…
3. Kili's Wound
…Kili doesn't get struck by a poisoned arrow in the book.
No poisoned arrow, no need for hot Elf to save him. Problem solved.
Again, this is another unnecessary plot change.
Which begs the question…
4. Why did the Elves just Let Them Go?
Bilbo puts Dwarves in barrels. Okay. They all escape through the hole int he floor. Okay, I'm still with you. Elves go after Dwarves. This, I understand. Orcs show up and attack Dwarves in barrels. Understandable. Elves show up and attack the attacking Orcs. Also understandable. Orcs run off, Dwarves float off, Elves watch Dwarves float out, then return to Thranduil. What?
If they're after the Dwarves, and the Dwarves are literally trapped by the river gate thing, then why do they just let them float by when the Orcs are defeated? Wouldn't it make more sense to recapture your prisoners if they're right there and easily grab-able. That makes no sense. They were kind enough to let them go for the sake of us movie-goers, because Desolation of Smaug would have been insanely long and boring if they'd spent the majority of the film's duration in Mirkwood prison. But, it's not practical. If you're chasing a group of escapees, and you all get attacked by a mutual enemy, you still don't just let your original captives get away. Not when you're as organized and efficient as the Elves of Middle Earth.
There's a fine line between reality and believability. This incident crosses both lines, and touches on the completely, unforgivably unbelievable side of the line.
So, besides scenery and all-around awesomeness, did Desolation have any redeeming qualities?
Actually, yes.
"Like what?" you ask?
Thorin and Bilbo's character journeys for one thing.
But, that's going to have to wait until the next blog post. (Oh yes, I'm pulling a cliffhanger on you all!)
But, don't worry. I won't make you wait as long this time.
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